Quiet

Things have been quiet around here lately.
Not real life quiet, just internet quiet.

Real life has actually been pretty loud.

Stressfully loud.

“There are so many things going on my life and I can’t handle it.” loud.

Family traveling for the first time out of the country.
A husband (who hasn’t gone to the doctor in years) having multiple doctor’s appointments to find out what’s making his stomach hurt.
Tough, but right work decisions that effect others.
And a grandparent diagnosed with brain cancer just weeks after my grandma passed away.

There’s a lot of tears.
A lot of asking, “Why God?”
And pressing in to Him even when I don’t “feel” like it.
A lot of saying, “Hard, but good.” when people ask how we are.
A lot of doing uncomfortable things, like sharing these struggles with others so that they can pray with and for us because I can’t do it alone.

Life is sweet.
And good.
But it’s not always easy.
And I’m not built to hold it inside and not share anything with others.

That’s what this year and this season of life is teaching me.

So, I don’t know what’s next.
But I’m trusting that the Lord knows.
And I’m pressing into Him.
Asking Him questions.
Telling Him that it hurts, although He already knows.
And trying my best to thank Him for all the sweetness.

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2 thoughts on “Quiet

  1. Oh, dear friend. I am so sorry to hear about all that’s been going on in your life–all of the tears, changes, stress, and questions. It can be so hard to tell others about our struggles but I pray that you will find peace and comfort through this process. I’ve been trying to do the same myself, asking for prayers, sharing the depths of my heart, and just letting Jesus into the places where I’ve tried to block Him out (even though I know He’s the One and only answer!). Praying and thinking lots about you and your family! ❤

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