sixty | processing

Today Josh got the keys to his/our apartment.
We’ll just call it “the” apartment to avoid further confusion.
He’s living there from May until June 22 while he works in Nixa and finishes up school.
I’ll be finishing up my time at the Lighthouse, then moving back to Sedalia until June 22.
Which is 60 days from today.
59 cause it’s almost midnight right?
Right.
I have been excited for this day for a while now – imagining what it would look like, all the feelings of joy and happiness of seeing “our” apartment, the place we would spend our first year of marriage for the very first time.
And to be honest – the place is perfect.
I mean…perfect.
You might hear the word “small” in it’s description at some point but it really is the cutest {and possibly cleanest} place I will have lived.
I love that place.
But I wasn’t all there.
And I regretted that the moment I pulled out of that driveway.
I let myself get weighed down with stresses from school and roommates.
Distracted from being excited about our home.
I’m not really sure where I’m going with this.
Just expressing some thoughts here.
This is way more for me than ya’ll probably.
Maybe I’m just impatiently waiting for a time for me to be there and for it to hit me.
This is our home.
Maybe this won’t come till we move our stuff in.
Or maybe it’ll come just sitting there with friends as it’s “J’s” apartment.
Who knows.
Maybe it’s already hit me and I’m just too distracted to think about it.
Maybe I’m just handling this whole his, then ours thing in a different way than I expected.
Who knows.
Processing here.
These next few weeks are going to be some tough ones.
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4 thoughts on “sixty | processing

  1. getting an apartment is such an exciting thing! i'm sure once the stress of school and such is gone, you will be able to more fully embrace and appreciate the transition and significance of it 🙂 i can't wait to see pictures after you move in, i bet it's so cute!

    grace & love,
    kristyn

    Like

  2. How exciting!!

    For us, it didn't feel like we had our own apartment or that we were really actually married for about six months. haha it just felt like we were playing house or something.

    Good luck to you! I'm sure it will be stressful, but so worth it.

    Like

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